Why is Keeping Commitments So Hard?

In honor of this new year, and resolutions and all that good stuff, I want to share about the importance of keeping commitments. It seems like it is one of the things that can be super difficult for us, no matter what the commitment is.

I know God is very serious about letting your “Yes” be “Yes” and your “No” be “No”.  I have always been very nervous about giving my word and making sure that my Word stays true.  I want to be a women of my word.  I really do!

Right now, in our church we are doing a corporate fast for 21 days.  Everyone choose one thing to fast many do 1 meal per day, and others fast sweets or TV.  I did not take part in it the year before, so I decided to try to do it this year.  I cannot fast food because of a medication I am not, so I decided that I would fast TV in the evenings for 30 minutes to an hour and during that time spend time with God and in prayer. I did not fully commit to this, but I told God I would really try my best.  My intentions were good.

Well, I did great for about a week and then my husband went out of town and I was on my own with the kids for a whole week.  By the end of the day, I was totally exhausted and by the time I put the kids to bed, all I could do was fall into my own bed and watch a little TV before I went to sleep myself.

So, there it is….. lack of commitment.  Yes, I feel pretty bad about it.  I really wanted to fast and be in unity with my church, but I failed. 🙁  No wonder I was afraid to actually COMMIT to God on the whole “fasting” thing.   But the thing is, He knows and I am sure He still loves me.  Thank God He is super patient with us.

Then I thought about how hard it is to keep a commitment in this day and age OUTSIDE of the already crazy busy schedules we have on a daily basis.  Then add multiple children into the mix and fulltime jobs and meals and….. on and on!  LOL  There will always be something that comes up to try and break our commitments.  Yes, God is patient, but that does not give us the right to be the type of people whose word cannot be trusted.

I run a Mom’s group at my church and we meet once a month on Saturday.  We have quite a bit of moms of small children who attend our church but we usually have only a handful of ladies who show up to our meeting.  It gets discouraging sometimes because my partner and I pour our hearts into being there and preparing lessons, etc.  We often have people SAY they are coming and then they don’t come.  It is frustrating sometimes.  But who am I to judge?  Who says I would not do the same?

In sharing on this subject, I decide to do a little of my usual research and I found a few good articles.  One from EzineArticles.com talked about ways to KEEP commitments that you make.  Here are a few:

• Be Careful What You Agree To: Many people find it easier to say yes instead of no. It is far better to agree to what you can do, than saying yes to please someone at the moment and later fail your commitment because of being over-committed or because you have difficulty saying no.

• Manage Your Commitments: Keep a log of your commitments – Write them down. You may have great intentions, but if you forget to do what you agreed to do, the result is the same as your ‘Choosing’ not to keep your commitment.

• Renegotiate When You Are Unable to Keep Your Commitment: When you discover you are unable or unwilling to complete an agreement, go to the other party/parties and renegotiate – explain why, etc.  Connect – Don’t ignore.

• Manage By Agreement: Instead of TELLING someone to do something, ASK if they would agree to doing it. You have a greater chance it will get done if you ask rather than tell

Those are some good ideas.  Sharing this has really put things into perspective for me.  And again, as in any other thing that we may struggle with – BALANCE is key.

One of the things that God has been speaking to my heart about is being Committed to my family.  As many of you know, I am a work at home mom.  I run a Graphic Design business called DPK Graphic Design.  I have an enormous amount of work coming in and it has been really hard for me to stay in balance.  My work time is limited because of the kids and I really only have a few hours each day (usually during naptime).  I squeeze time in between, but there are so many distractions and I wind up getting upset more often than not.  I really don’t want to live that way (being frustrated all the time).

I enjoy what I do very much, but it can be tedious.  I am totally committed to my work and my clients, but it can cause a battle between the time with my family.  For a long time I have felt that God has been wanting me to create a work schedule that would help alleviate the stress that I get under and at the same time give more back to my family.

When my 2 older ones get home from school, I do get off the computer and prepare dinner and do homework, but I am always sneaking a few minutes here and there to check email or finalize a graphic, etc.  So my time is divided and I know it has an affect on my kids and my husband.

I have 2 options and I am just not sure which to choose just yet.  I can either take one or 2 evenings totally off from my work and spend it with my family.  I mean computer is totally shut down for those evenings.  Or I can make sure that I don’t work for a couple hours every evening and then work later on once the kids are settled (dinner finished, kitchen cleaned, homework done, etc).

I don’t know why I am so afraid to commit to this.  I guess I feel like I will fail and then beat myself up.  But in my heart, I feel like God is urging me to make some decisions and I also have peace that He will work out the rest.

What are your thoughts on this?  Are any of you WAHM’s?  What type of schedule do you keep?  How do you keep balance between work and family?  What kind of schedule are you keeping?  Are you able to stay committed to it?  What do you think about this whole “trouble with commitment thing”?   I always love hearing from my readers!

God bless you guys!  And remember… KEEPING COMMITMENTS ARE IMPORTANT!

And finally, here are a couple funny cartoons I found about New Year’s resolutions.  Cute…