I was recently inspired by a blogging buddy of mine, Alyssa Avant.? She wrote a post called More Time to be a Mom (be sure to check it out).
This has always been a huge issue with me running 2 home based businesses.? With everything that needs to be done around the house, meals, driving to school, work, and everything in between – there is not much time for me to really enjoy spending quality time with my children.
It amazes me how quickly time goes by.? My oldest will be 5 soon and starting Kindergarten in the fall.? It feels like yesterday that he took his first steps.? I look back and wish that I could re-live some of those moments and not have to worry about time rushing things along.
I always longed to be a mother ever since I was a little girl and now that I am one, I feel like I am not enjoying it as much as I could be.? I wish I didn’t have to work sometimes so I could focus more on my children, but that isn’t reality.? I have to do what I need to do in order to help support my family especially with today’s economy.? I often forget that I am extremely blessed to be working from home and am able to make my own schedule.? So many moms have to go out and work and have no choice but to put their children in daycare.? I have several friends in this situation.
So, how can we have balance in our lives as mothers?? How can we give more time to our children?? Alyssa (in her blog post) mentioned adjusting your schedule to make the most of your time within a week.?? It may SEEM like you don’t have time, but really, we MAKE time.? I am going to be working on adjusting my time schedule in order to fit in the 4 people that matter most to me (my husband and my 3 children).
Here is a list of things I would like to do in order to help me have more time to be a mom.
- Be more willing to stop what I am doing to give my time to my children
- Say “No” if I need to – to extra work, activities, etc
- Organize a weekly work schedule and stick to it
- Limit my blog posting (not sure yet on this, because I run 4 blogs)
- Get more rest by going to bed earlier (I have been staying up till midnight working each night)
- Spend time each evening with family to talk about our day, play games, etc.
- Start having a weekly meal plan
I would love to hear your ideas on how you fit in quality family time in the midst of a busy life, no matter if you are a stay at home mom, work at home mom, or even a work outside of the home mom.? What do you think of my list?? What else do you think I should add?
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I’m definitely with you on this one and recently promised myself I was going to make a serious effort to be more focused and present for my children. I definitely think the getting more rest is key – I find myself more crabby and easily overwhelmed because I am so often exhausted. It’s hard when the only time to get things done is between 8 and whenever but I’m trying to discipline myself to turn off the computer and go to bed.
Also, I’ve been trying to think about making my interactions with my children count more – for all of us. What I mean is this: perhaps instead of spending two hours together where I’m distracted and not really paying close enough attention to them (jumping on the computer or trying to do a load of laundry for example) I give them 30 minutes of completely focused, dedicated time where I let them choose what we do and I don’t try to multitask. I often find that they are so happy after I’ve done this (and I feel good and guilt free) that they will play independently for a bit while I get something else done.
I also try to remind myself daily that some day they aren’t going to *want* to hang out with me – and that day isn’t as far away as I’d like to think!
How timely and insightful is your post. Thank you. I have been thinking about the same things. I am struck by just a month ago KJ wasn’t speaking in sentences and KG couldn’t tie her shoes. Now KJ’s asking questions using real words and KG’s tying her shoes and going to cheerleading camp. I want my girls to be able to look back and KNOW they had my attention’; That I was always proud of them and that they could trust me implicitly.
I am moved to make more time. We spend most weekends together. Totally. I don’t get online until they go to bed. We spend all day together doing family “stuff” whether is playing games, Barbies, or just cleaning (Ha.).
Thanks for this. I really think you’re a great mom and it’s awesome that you are so motivated to spend more time with your loved ones.
Brandy Tanner says
I love this post, because I have been thinking right along the same lines as you! I have not written out a schedule BUT have stuck to giving my boys their attention first thing in the morning, and if I have something that “must” be done for work before I can play with them, I get it done ASAP to allow for more fun time. Both my boys “attempt” to nap for a few hours in the afternoon, so I reserve work time to be around their schedule best I can. Lately I have been saying NO to things that could be “extra” so that I don’t put MOMMY to the test…it’s hard to be a work at home mom, and I so hear you…and I am here to help support you in your decision to try to make more mommy time!!
Suzanne B (Crunchy green Mom) says
I was thinking about this as well yesterday while we were doing Sunday cleaning.
I am a single mom of six that works outside of the home as well as taking care of my home when I make it back there.
Things I decided to do this month. (I am starting this mental challenge per month.)
*Read to my toddlers every night, one book a day. Sitting on the floor of my room, no distractions, no blackberry… just them and I.
*Watch one TV show with my son (14 y.o.) a week. Just he and I sitting down and watching TV.
*Watch funny videos with my two oldest daughters (17yo and 15 yo). Spend time laughing at least once a week!
Mary Lutz says
I think your list is awesome and there’s probably at least one thing we can all do to make more time for our families. My youngest is 16 so I work when she is at school and my hubby is at work. I try (although I need to try harder) to not be working when the family is around. It’s so easy NOT to put the laptop down though because I AM home, so I feel like I am still interacting with them. Now I know that’s not true; I know they need my full attention, so that’s what I have to work on. Thanks for the reminder! 🙂
Leslie- La Mama Naturale' says
Great list. It’s hard to juggle everything in at once all in a day’s time. How funny! It looks like all of us having been thinking about this. I’m trying to wean myself from being at the lappy so much and delving into all these projects when I realize my son needs me and quality time to learn and grow. It’s hard- I use my time wisely have my play time when he’s napping or in bed for the night. Sometimes, I get so caught up that I feel bad at the end of the day. You only have them at this age once. 🙁 And, you only have so much time in your day to be you and do the things us mom’s enjoy! 🙂 That’s why woman rock, because we can master these things and still have fun.
This might sound silly. I too work from home, but I constantly run across street to play with the neighbor’s twins. I’ve known then since they are 3 and 4 pounds at hospital. Now at 18 months I am so taken with them…more each day. I have helped them learn to crawl, walk and sing songs. I have special games with them that I made up. I HAVE to see them at least 5 days a week. Mom works, so I am best buddies with the nanny. I never had my own kids, and sometime I just put the work aside, thinking “I’ll never get this time back with them, they are growing so fast.” I know I am a good thing in their life, but they are an amazing part of my life too. And, it’s worth a little less computer time, etc. just to sing row row row your boat and see them sing and dance. They are identical boys.