…except I think I would have a laptop balanced on my head and definitely no make-up on. LOL

I’ll tell ya, things have been busier than ever for me.  I am so grateful for all the work that has been coming in, but I do feel at times like I might explode. There are so many distractions (baby, child, home, family) lots and lots of wonderful, yet sometimes annoying distractions.  It is really not easy working from home with small children to take care of at the same time.  Sometimes I feel like I am invincible and I can do it all – yeah my “super mom” spirit tends to kick in at times.  But then the next day I am nagging my husband, and snapping at the kids.  No, I don’t often do that, but when I do – it isn’t pretty. And why do I do that?  Because I am exhausted, that’s why!

I just get strung out and just plain tired from holding it all together and not taking one moment for ME.  Of all people, I KNOW the importance of ME TIME.  But do I have time to take it?  NO!!  Instead I am spending every waking moment going and going and doing and doing until finally I collapse.

Am I complaining?  Nah, maybe just venting a little bit.  I guess this is just ME taking some actual ME time, right?  LOL …writing about what’s on my mind….  taking the opportunity to identify what I am feeling – getting it out and letting it go.

It sure has been a rough few months and yes, it continues on.  So much drama this life throws at us.  I am sure all of you (my readers) can relate.  There are times of great joy and then times of great discouragement.  But I have learned a long time ago that we cannot base our feelings on our circumstances.  It doesn’t matter whether things are going wrong or going right – we have the power to take control the way we think and the way we act in the midst of the difficult times.  My joy cannot be based on whether my day goes as planned or whether it doesn’t.

So, I share all that, why?  Because I needed to.  Yup, it really does help to write.

How about you?  Are you going through anything right now?  Sometimes it helps to lift someone else up when you are having a hard time yourself.  I am here guys.  I know I don’t have a lot of time to do work and things like that.  But I do have free time when I am feeding the baby every 2 hours during the day and I use that time to pray.  So, like I said, please share.  I love to hear from my readers and I would love to pray for you.

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I think all of my children have gone through the stage of banging their heads when they get upset, angry, or frustrated.  I have always wondered why they would want to inflict pain on themselves like that.

My 1 yr old son has been banging his head A LOT lately and it is really getting to me.  He will bang his head on the floor (carpet or tile – it doesn’t matter).  He bangs his head on furniture and on walls.  He even bangs his head on ME.  Sometimes he will bang it softly and it doesn’t necessarily hurt him, but sometimes he will bang his head really hard until he makes himself cry.   I have even seen marks on his forehead from the banging.

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I did some research about toddlers banging their heads and why they do it and it pretty much confirmed what I thought.

According to BabyCenter.com, they list out several possibilities:

• Self-comfort. This one seems a little weird to me.  I have heard of thumb sucking, rocking, and hair pulling for self comfort, but not head banging.  They say that toddlers sometimes bang their heads to relax. They bang their heads rhythmically as they’re falling asleep, when they wake up in the middle of the night, or even while they’re sleeping. Developmental experts believe that the rhythmic motion, like rocking in a chair, may help toddlers sooth themselves.

• Pain relief. This one makes sense to me.  I have felt like banging my own head when I am in pain with a migraine or a toothache.  Your toddler may also bang their head if they are in pain — from teething or an ear infection, for example. Head banging seems to help kids feel better, perhaps by distracting them from their discomfort.

• Frustration. This is the one that I see in my 1 yr old.  They say, if your toddler bangs their head during temper tantrums, that they probably are trying to vent some strong emotions. They haven’t yet learned to express their feelings adequately through words, so they are using physical actions. They can also be comforting themselves from being frustrated.

• A need for attention. I do see this sometimes in my toddler.  Ongoing head banging can be a way for your toddler to get attention.  Understandably, as parents, we can get upset seeing our child banging their head.  And since he likes it when you fuss over his behavior, he may continue the head banging in order to get the attention he wants.

• A developmental problem. Head banging can be associated with developmental disorders such as autism. It can be one of many behavioral red flags. Rarely does head banging alone signal a serious problem.

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I have to say I feel much better reading this list of possible reasons my toddler would be banging his head.  I know that this phase will not last.  Once he is able to express himself better through words, I think that the head banging will decrease and eventually stop altogether.  Right now, my 1 yr old son doesn’t talk, so he is just using the physical action of banging his head to get the emotion and frustration out.

I think it is probably best to not pay too much attention too it, because it can become a need for attention.  I have seen the head banging increase since I started saying to my son “No, don’t bang your head..”.  I am going to work on ignoring it just like I ignore my older children’s pouting.

So, if you are struggling with having a child who bangs their head for self comfort, pain relief, frustration, or the need for attention – don’t fear – this too shall pass.  In a few years you will look back and laugh about it.  And if your child is showing signs of developmental issues, then share your concerns with your pediatrician and they will point you in the right direction for further help.

How about you?  Have you ever dealt with a child who bangs their head?  What did you do?

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Right now, I have the wonderful privilege of only having to deal with my 2 younger children.  My mom has my 4 & 5 yr olds staying with her at her house for an entire week.  I have been keeping in touch with them by phone.  This is actually my first time that I have been away from them for this long without being on vacation.

My mom has been doing lots of fun things with them.   She has been taking them to church, family & friends houses, and even doctor appointments.  I have to be honest with you though, I was a bit leary about my mom taking them out at night.  Here at home, we hardly ever go out at night.  I usually have them in bed by 7:30pm.  So taking them to church at that time made me nervous.

My mom told me to not worry about it that they were fine and that she used to take me and my brother to church at night and we were fine.  I guess I just have a hard time letting go of control.  Right now I am not in control at all and it can be tough.  But I am 2 hours away and I really don’t need to be controlling things when my mom is perfectly capable of taking good care of my children.

My mom mentioned to me that she would be taking them to one of her doctors appointments and that they have a play room for the kids there that she can leave them in while being seen.  I expressed my concern that they would be left alone and my mom told me not to worry that she would keep an eye on them and that the reception ladies would also watch out.  Am I being overprotective worrying about this?

I have expressed my concern about my kids several times over the past week that they have been with my mom.   She always tells me not to worry.  And I know that she is right.  I trust her more than I would trust anyone else with my children.  She is a lot like me and I know that she would care for them the same way that I would.  I really do love that about her.

So, it comes down to the fact that I am not in control right now.  I have had to let go of that mothering control and it really can be hard for someone like me.  But my mom told me that there comes a point where we have to let our children go.  If we hold on too tightly, this can cause problems in the future.  She is right.  When you try to control someone too much, even a child – the child will have the tendency to pull away and fight you more.  I think there has to be boundaries when it comes to control.  Yes, there are times to be protective of your children.  But there are also times when you need to let them go and allow them to learn and grow without you constantly there breathing down their neck.

Do you have issues with control?  Are you overprotective with you children?  I would love to hear your feedback on this subject.

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(This is NOT our apartment.  LOL  Finding this picture  made me feel a little bit better about my situation though.)

This past week has been a total nightmare.  It all started this past Monday morning when I, once again, stepped into a puddle of water in our living room.  Our apartment has flooded several times over the past few years, so I was used to it.  I put a call in to our landlord and they went to go pull up the carpets in the area that usually flooded.  I opened the closet door and was in total shock.  There was a stream of water pouring out of the wall like a faucet.  I started sobbing.  By the time my landlord got there I had almost fallen apart entirely.

There was not much he could do.  The water just came in like a flood going from our living room and spreading out to our bedrooms.  Those are the rooms that were carpeted.  The carpet was very old too.  In the summer we had mold and mildew issues so the carpet always smelled disgusting anyway.  So I knew having a flood like this would just make everything a million times worse.

I called my husband to come home (he was at work) and we were trying to find a place to go that was local.  Thank God for our Pastor who made arrangements for us to stay with people from our church who had an empty apartment.  But I knew that would be difficult for me to be alone in an unknown place with 4 little children.  My mom told us we could come stay with her in NJ (2 hours away).  The kids would not be able to go to school, but I thought it would be best because at least I would have some help.

We started to pack up our things.  We sloshed through the water packing clothes in suitcases and gathering everything else that we would need.  I couldn’t stop crying.  I guess the fact that I was sleep depraved just from having a 1 month old in the house – made it soooo much worse.  I felt like my whole world was falling apart.  And then to top it all off, in the midst of our frantic packing – the power went out.  So we then had to pack sloshing through a flood AND with no light.  Crazy right?

Thanks God our 2 older ones were in school and my 1 yr old was napping when I first so the flood.  He slept for almost 3 hours that day as the chaos was happening right outside his door and as the water was making its way to his crib.  When he woke up it got crazy because he did not understand why he could not walk on the floor.  We tried to keep him in the pack & play, but after about 30 minutes he started freaking out.  We then had to call a friend who came over to help with the kids while we finished the packing.

We also had to move all the furniture out of the rooms into the kitchen (the one room that the water did not quite get to).  That was nuts too because we wound up breaking one of our dressers and scratching the tile floor in the kitchen.

We finally got out, picked up the kids from school, got McDonalds, and were on our way to NJ to my moms house.  I was exhausted – more than exhausted.

We have now been at my moms for almost a week waiting to figure out if / when we could go back to our apartment.  We kept in touch with our landlord by phone.  He was doing his best to sop up the water and used some heavy duty heaters to get the carpet dry.  But I told him that he really needed to have the carpets ripped up and replaced.  I just could not risk facing mold and mildew issues from the padding & concrete underneath not drying properly, especially with small children who practically LIVE on the floor.  He kept assuring me that he would be replacing the carpets as soon as they figured out the leak and that it would only be a few months.  But I said no that we wanted them ripped up or we really could not come back there with the kids.

Underneath the carpet is only concrete, so my landlord was concerned and did not want to have to purchase area rugs if he was going to pay to replace the carpets.  I just told him not to worry about it, even though I thought it might not be fair that we would have to pay money out of our pocket when this was not at all our fault.  But at the same time, I understand.   They had already paid thousands of dollars to have the entire front of the house ripped up and new drain pipes laid just a few weeks prior to the flood.  But instead of fixing the problem, it actually made it worse. 

So, we have now been at my moms for a week.  She is so awesome for taking us in.  It has not been easy at all, but we are getting through.  We found out from the landlord that he did wind up ripping out the carpets.  But he also let me know that because of some big heaters that he had going in our apartment – all of my previous plants have died – there were probably around 15 of them.

I think I might be the most upset about that.  I am a HUGE plant lover.  I have had many of my plants for several years.  They were my babies.  I have not yet gone back to the apartment to see them all dead, we are going to be doing that tomorrow.  Hubby and I are going to go without the kids and assess the situation.  I am hoping that the concrete will be dry so we can lay the area rugs and move the furniture back.  We have been trying to find a new place to live, but there is not much available in our area within our price range.  Right now we are stuck where we are and I am working hard at making the best of it.

A scripture keeps coming into my head as my brain battles back and forth with negative thoughts.  It has always been one of my favorites.  Proverbs 3:5,6  “Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths.”  I know God has a plan for us, no matter how bleak things are looking.  I have had a lot of prayers and support through this and I am so grateful for that.

My moms pastor also preached an awesome message yesterday on not basing your joy on your current circumstances.  Storms of life will definitely come, but we can rely on the Lord to keep us calm in the midst of the raging waters.   I love that!

So many people are going through WAY more horrible things in comparison to our flood.  Look at the people in Haiti who have lost everything.  So, that has also helped.  Putting things into perspective.  Yes, I lost my plants – but I still have my children.  Plants we can replace – people you cannot replace.

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OK, now that you have watched, what do you think?  I actually went on the Nick.com site and saw this for myself.  You can too if you go into “more” in the top navigation.  You will then see a link for “addicting games”.  Even the name just doesn’t seem right.  Anyway, that will take you to the addicting games website.  It does say that you are leaving Nick.com, but if they have an obvious link out to them, then they are affiliated with the site.

My kids are still young yet, but I am horrified that a child friendly company like Nickelodeon would allow this.  I am writing this post in hopes that those of you bloggers out there would be aware and possibly also write a post.  Maybe we can put a stop to this!

Please leave me a comment and let me know what you think about this. And if you do blog about this, leave the link in your comment.  Thanks so much guys!

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